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07.12.2010
t r a n s f o r m u s
last year, olivia insisted that i go. she said it would change my life. i resisted. she persisted. i ended up going.
and she was right.
my first experience with transformus wasn't perfect. i went in with an open mind, but was very naive to the experience at first. in fact, that first night was a nightmare. i couldn't find the camp, i didn't have a flashlight, i was ... lost.
soon, though, it really did transform me.
i quickly got used to what it was really about - about being free. about transforming your reality. i became more open to my core. to love. my time there felt organic. it was like i came home.
my second transformus will happen in three days. and i can't wait. like last year, it is coming at the perfect time. i need a cleansing. i will report back with photos and stories. and my friends will see it in me. i'll tell them that i had to leave home to go home.
listening to: dirty projectors + bjork // Mount Wittenberg Orca
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06.28.2010
all moved in
that's just some of the sights of the loft. i love it here. truly. this has been a positive step in my life. and it's starting to feel like home. i definitely made a lot of memories in my old place - shit, i was there for 6 years and recorded all of my albums & wrote most of my poems in that house.
the loft has a new energy. i'm looking forward to seeing what art i create while living here. but i am being careful with my ego - i can't put too much emotional energy into the loft. because it is just a thing.
i did a show at aster hall last week and it felt gooooooooooooood. who knows why i've neglected that side of my personality for so long. i really haven't been doing much poetry performances lately, even though i've been writing a lot.
but i have a feeling you will all see me on stage more. that's when i feel the most alive.
i've also started thinking of a new album ... as always, it has to be different than the last. i find that i can't start a big project if it doesn't have some sort of theme to it. it just can't be random songs, random poems. there has to be a connection.
knowing me, though, there will be a new album up on here next week and i won't even know where it came from.
another thing that's happening is a move toward spirituality. i've been on this path for a long time now, but didn't have a name for it. it was just a natural way of being. and someone calls it "spirituality" ... so i guess that's what it is. lots of books, lots of journaling, lots of ... awareness.
listening to: the roots // how i got over
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04.26.2010
your next bold move
i've decided to make the step into owning a home. a loft, to be specific.
i've lived and loved in my current place for 7 years, but there's something moving me in another direction. i can't explain it, but it's the right move.
not that it's been easy.
buying a place means dealing with credit, loans, mortgages, tax credits, all-day classes at libraries. grown-up stuff. but, again, there's something bigger going on here.
i can't wait. the francis street lofts are uber hip - modern looking and beautiful. great location (next to hampton park, near moe's crosstown and work, still). i can still ride my bike everywhere. and i get a 42-inch plasma TV. wooo.
i'll post pics and video once i get there. and i'll invite you over for some drinks.
listening to: the national // high violet
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03.30.2010
it happens.
i get obsessed with new albums. it takes over my life. and 2010 has been RIDICULOUS. lots of healthy obsessions ...
autechre, joanna newsom, RJD2, metavari, sidewalk chalk, sade, bear in heaven, four tet, gorillaz, the q4, the album leaf ... and now erykah badu.
oh, erykah. you've blown me away with this "return of the ankh" shit. i mean, really. "you loving me (your funeral)" is brilliant. and "window seat." and "20 feet tall." and "gone baby, don't be long." only you could do a song called "umm hmm" and make it work. for real. i'm floored. listening to it now. can't type. complete. sentences.
this album is a brutal honest look at love. but it's so beautiful. thank you.
listening to: take a guess
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03.18.2010
what's really behind the 'scene'
i am alive. so alive. sometimes i feel overwhelmed with it. sometimes i'm so at peace with life that i have moments of complete and utter bliss. perfection.
it's because of rachbob. it's because of this, it's because of work.
let me talk about work. lately, i've i run into people who want me to "bring down" the city paper. it should be known that i am not trying to do that. (because, seriously? i can't). and i am not coming at this from a money angle. that's for the bean counters and that is an angle that really has no place in my energy or ego. it's unhealthy.
i want to make change. i want to influence people's lives in a positive way. expose the city to the light that is charleston. and not compete. at all. please do not project that on to me.
what can i say? call me a hippie.
the change is already happening. after the second issue, i see things happening for the artists we profile. love it.
since i last updated the blog, i've gotten into doing video. this is the one that really kicked that passion into gear. i love carrying my little vado hd around and capturing events in charleston. there's SO MUCH going on, it's pretty crazy.
until the next update ...
listening to: joanna newsom//have one on me.
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03.17.2010
windfall rainfall
I.
somewhere
the rain falls like snow flurries
and a woman is covered in clouds,
finding angels in the ground,
bearing the weight of heaven's fog
through an inner silence.
II.
sometimes,
the air is so thick
it makes her drunk
and no amount of peace
can shield the persistence
of a storm.
III.
somehow,
a forecast
is more than just foreshadowing -
it is the mirror of your true self
breaking through
the gray.
listening to: metavari//Be One Of Us And Hear No Noise.
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11.21.2009
true story:
in the last two days, i
met a member of the village people
went to a party where cell phones and cameras weren't allowed
touched two real, live camels
stood two feet away from mackenzie phillips
ordered a blue martini from a man who was covered in fruit (in a bathtub)
... and the weekend just started.
listening to: janet jackson//janet.
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11.12.2009
at the dawning ...
how do you stand still
when a woman is an earthquake,
shaking the ground
beneath your feet?
how do you act cool
when she is a volcano,
erupting fire in your veins?
how do you tiptoe
around the remains of the past
that lay sleeping
in the darkened corners of your mind?
how did you find
yourself drowning in desire
after your heart
suffered a deep, long drought?
why do we doubt love
when its truth is never hiding,
and why does she remind me
of the red sun's rising?
what are the questions
we are afraid of,
and how do i get
to the answers?
listening to: the flaming lips//embryonic
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11.05.2009
for 26 years ...
i have been making music. how crazy is that? i unleashed the latest one, digital detox, on my birthday. and i'm proud of it. i'm also proud of how uncompromising it is (to me, at least).
i can't accurately describe the intense, electric rush i get when i am creating something that i believe in. it's a feeling that nothing else but love can touch. in creating the new album, i locked myself up in my house for a few weeks and sketched out the whole thing visually before laying it down on my computer. this is the process i've kept since i was a little kid. it's natural to me.
anyway, thanks for the positive responses to it. because i know that shit is weird. haha.
speaking of music, it's that time of the year again when AMAZING albums have been unleashed. volcano choir?yes. the new flaming lips? yes. that album by erin mckeown? hell yes. love it all.
i've started conceptualizing the new poetry book - it's going to be an online thing, with artwork and some spoken word pieces. that's going to take up a lot of my energy and carry me on into the new year.
and after that? starting a hip-hop/jazz/improv band in charleston. you heard it here first.
listening to: volcano choir//unmap
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11.02.2009
i am a lucky boy
click here
listening to: volcano choir//unmap
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10.05.2009
amazing.
i live a blessed life. i feel so lucky for all that i've accomplished, and the knowledge that i have so much left to learn. for that, i am thankful.
so let me update you on the last few weeks.
i went to beaufort to perform in the monthly poetry and pancakes event and had a great time. i performed in the slam, and came in second place. the room and the vibe was so positive. i fed off of that energy and was even dancing by the end of the night. having all-you-can-eat pancakes doesn't hurt, either.
last week, i was invited to a fundraiser for charleston stage, which was also awesome. i think back to a year ago, when i was new at the preview job. i went to a similar event, and wasn't as comfortable as i am now. now, though, i get it and i know how important those events are.
and wow - charleston magazine chose me as "one of charleston's 15 most intriguing people." still can't believe that. damn, though, i'm happy about that. really cool.
also, the weekly TV show is in full effect. i have a spot on "in the news with warren peper" to talk about preview. the show airs every day at 3 and 8 p.m. check it out.
last weekend i went to st. augustine with jason and matt. the ultimate guys weekend? why, yes. we even saw the jacksonville jaguars play the titans. it doesn't get much better than that.
listening to: gossip//music for men
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09.03.2009
pure energy ... (updated)
remember a few blogs back when i said i was going to put more energy into my performances? check it:
aug. 29: performance for possible ETV show in north charleston
sept. 5: a 30 minute spoken- word performance for the park circle play fest
sept. 12: a 30 minute poetry reading (not performance) for the play fest
sept. 19: performance for the mahsati janan belly dancing show in north charleston
sept. 20: peace one day event at the music farm
sept. 21: lecture for redux's double vision series
sept. 26: slam competition in beaufort
oct. 25: opening up for lindsay holler at the pour house
nov. 7: performance for kulture klash
am i forgetting something?
listening to: a very good mix cd someone gave me.
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08.03.2009
the spark
i'm thinking this is going to be the cover of the new book. it's going to be a DIY-type thing ... containing all of the poems post-"paper cut." i'll have it as a download on the web site and i'm putting it together now. the pic was taken by jason, who is a kick ass mofo.
speaking of poems, i've been on a tear lately. one dark one, one light one. both good, in my opinion. many more to come.
(and on a random note, how much fun was fr3sh?
listening to: the national//alligator
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07.27.2009
what kindness ...
an e-mail from local artist danita cole, after i gave her some press:
"and marcus, thanks for making my opening a success! i sold one original painting to a research compliance coordinator from c of c, got a commission and sold a ton of supplies for wax art. nice.
i love that you are a fan; i feel your love radiate from your chest like the shield of a warrior. how can that ever be bad?!!"
this is why i love my job.
listening to: mogwai//mr. beast
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07.25.2009
an e-mail sent to a friend ...
i kept thinking about you this weekend. i went to transformus, a camping / arts / burn festival in the mountains of asheville. you would have loved it.
it is completely community driven - no corporate sponsors, no electricity, no vendors, no money allowed. i totally got use to that idea. one person made me recite a poem for some food. another just wanted a hug. there was a camp area called IHOP - "intergalactic house of pancakes" and they made AMAZING food. there was a dance floor. there were DJ booths. all off of generators. really amazing.
an e-mail won't even begin to explain my experience there. i totally had a personal and spiritual awakening.
i arrived on friday with a negative mind. i had been in tears for a lot of the drive, and there was a moment when i broke down about ... that first night.
and then ... saturday. i got more comfortable, and started to really take advantage of my surroundings. the big burn was saturday night, and i made it a point to write down, on 2 sheets of paper, what i wanted to let go of. the things i needed to "burn" emotionally to become a more spiritual person. i threw those pieces of paper in the fire.
knowing that others did the same thing, made it a really powerful experience. everyone's energy was going into that fire. and we all danced around it, hugged, cried and partied. the hours after the burn were the lightest i have ever felt.
i hope your weekend went well, too ... i am on a high.
listening to: st. vincent//actor
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07.12.2009
strong black vine ...
my college life was defined by four things. 1) unrequited love, 2) bad poetry, 3) ani difranco, 4) tori amos.
my connection to tori amos' music, after hearing "under the pink," took over my life. it was a deep emotional journey. an awakening, of sorts. i never heard anything like her before and drowned myself in everything that she released, said and created.
over time, my love for her faded to the background. i still called myself a fan, but i loosened my emotional grip on her as i matured and grew into my own art and other artists.
i have to say, though, this new album, "abnormally attracted to sin," is slowly pulling me back in. the last time i really submerged myself in all-things tori was "scarlet's walk." fucking brilliant album. though i got the stuff in between (and really enjoyed "american doll posse"), this new one feels different. it took some time, but i think this is some of the best stuff she's done.
and i hated it when i first heard it. ha. here's to taking time with music.
despite this post, i'm listening to: st. vincent//actor
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07.09.2009
bull black nova
i'm getting ready to put more energy to my art + performances. within the next two months and 4 days, i'm going to update charlestonpoets.com with three new projects: the new album, new artwork and visual poems. all 3 will be free. (donations accepted, of course).
i'm afraid of my ego. and whenever things get too much for me, i take a break and turn that part of my life off. i really think, though, if i put enough energy to performing a lot, things can take off. i just have to make sure i'm still having fun.
i did a show at the upper deck with jonathan, tina and aaron. i performed poems with a band, and tina painted live. it was magic, and lit a fire that had been smoldering for a few months. and now i'm jumping full steam ahead into some new shows. ("fr3sh" is august 1. super excited about that).
you know what my new big passion is? food. the culinary scene in charleston. it's fantastic here, beyond words. i'm pretty much in love with shine and the glass onion. next time i rent a car, i'm going to head out to some places in the north area, as well. i've devoted a lot of space to covering food in preview, as well.
this blog is random. time to go on a bike ride.
listening to: fever ray//fever ray
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07.01.2009
he's gone?
michael jackson was always bigger than life. there's no way to accurately weigh his impact on music, our culture, our life.
right now it feels like it did in the '80s, when you couldn't escape his image and his songs. bevin and i were riding bikes and heard "beat it" blasting in a car. at the recovery room later, we heard 5 songs from the jukebox. two more songs popped up when turning the radio dial. he's everywhere.
i'm more interested in the songs that people aren't familiar with. i've been digging deep into "invincible" - what makes someone create art when they really don't have to anymore? that's why i am so intrigued by artists when they get older (dylan, mitchell, mccartney, etc.) - they could just do tours of old material and end it at that. but it's inspiring to hear new music. to know that an icon is still hungry. it's great.
and "invincible" has a lot of gems - if he released "butterflies" or "cry" or the title track in 1984, he would have notched three more no. 1's. easily.
i'm emotional about all of this. like many kids who grew up in the '80s, MJ was my life. true, ulitmately prince was (and still is) all i needed, but once "thriller" and "bad" dropped, it was like entering another universe. i have so many memories.
it still doesn't seem real.
here's hoping people let him rest in peace. here's hoping all of you justin timberlake fans know where JT stole it from. here's to one of the greatest performers to ever walk this earth.
listening to: michael jackson//invincible
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05.22.2009
the best thing i've created?
yep. another record. this one is violent, glitchy, sharp, super focused, noisy, so electronic the circuits jump out of the speakers, uncompromising, weird, chaotic and waste-deep in its love of NIN's "year zero."
it's a concept album about the dangers of the internet, and social networking sites. sparked from the realization that i am too emotionally involved in this stuff sometimes. i'm singing on it and using my voice a lot more. 6 songs that i wrote. with melodies and shit. the trick? finding beauty in chaos. recorded over 3 weeks.
two things happened that sparked my creativity - love + music. when love finds me (bevin? hi.), and new music comes out that is inspiring (prince, prince, prince), then nothing can stop me.
you'll be hearing it soon.
it's "digital detox." running time: 37:51
tracklisting:
1. digital ...
2. 4:02
3. the gl:tch
4. ?
5. survival
6. the first breakthrough
7. the gl:tch 2
8. @you
9. 4:03
10. free.yerself
11. the gl:tch 3
12. dot
13. vs. analog
14. RFID
15. 4:04
16. ... detox
listening to: nine inch nails//year zero
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05.08.2009
what a dream ...
last night i dreamt that some friends and i were out of town for a concert. we rented a hotel room, and i left the room at the crack of dawn because i couldn't sleep.
what i experienced during that time period was amazing - vibrant green and blue colors dancing in front of me, the smell of honeydew, raindrops suspended in the air. (sure, this sounds like an acid trip, but read further ...)
during that experience, i was lifted into the air, and carried to the field where the concert was being held. people were in chairs on the concert field, but frozen. no movement at all. then, all of a sudden, black angels appeared from the sky, and made circular motions in the clouds to break open the atmosphere. (they looked like the nazgul in lord of the rings).
at that moment, the people in the crowd woke up, and started going frantic. everyone was yelling "the spirits are here!" - through dream logic, i knew that those "spirits" were from hell, and this was some form of armageddon. the spirits then zapped people into the otherworld with lightning. i saw a lot of people get sucked up into the atmosphere while screaming.
(uh ... still following?)
so anyway, needless to say, i was terrified. i managed to get back to the hotel, and some of my friends were still there. also through dream logic, i knew that we were safe in the hotel, and somehow i was spared from going to hell.
and .. that's all i remember. it all seems silly when written down, but i really felt heavy when i woke up this morning. such a weird dream.
clearly i shouldn't have mexican food before bed.
listening to: peaches//i feel cream
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05.03.2009
reaching out, reaching in
(image by chris tertzagian)
i live for moments of proximity. i live for what you and i shared this weekend. i live with the knowledge that we don't need to complete each other. i live without fear of failing. this weekend, i lived like i haven't lived in a long time.
thank you.
listening to: talkdemonic//eyes half mast
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